First Times

A collection of anonymous submissions from our community. These are lightly edited for clarity and length, but the voices are entirely their own.

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T., 28, the Netherlands

I was nine years old the first time I realised tickling was a “thing” for me — as in, something beyond just laughing when poked. My older brother had a friend over and they started doing the classic thing of holding me down and tickling me, and instead of being annoyed the way I was supposed to be, I remember thinking: I want this to last longer. I didn’t have words for it then. I just quietly filed it away. It took me until I was about twenty-two to find out there were other people who’d filed the same thing.

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Anonymous, 34, Germany

My first “intentional” adult experience was terrifying and then immediately hilarious. I’d found the forums and worked up the courage to meet someone for a session — very professional, very agreed-upon in advance. I got there and spent the first ten minutes being so nervous I could barely talk. Then they started and I laughed so hard I knocked a pillow off the couch onto the floor, and after that I wasn’t nervous anymore. Hard to maintain dignified anxiety when you’re completely losing it over someone scratching your ribs.

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M., 41, France

My wife found out I was into this by accident. I’d left a forum tab open — nothing explicit, just people talking about events and sessions. She asked about it, I panicked, then somehow we talked for two hours. She wasn’t weirded out. She was just curious. She offered to try it with me. That was eleven years ago. She still uses it as leverage when I’m being difficult. I’m fine with this arrangement.

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Anonymous, 22, Poland

I told my best friend I was “into tickling” after about four ciders and three hours of build-up. She looked at me blankly and said “like… the children’s thing?” and I died a little. Then she said “wait, like, as a whole actual interest?” and I said yes and she said “that’s so much less weird than what I thought you were about to say.” I still don’t know what she thought I was going to say. I’m too afraid to ask.

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R., 37, UK

First NEST was 2019. I’d been reading about it for years — it felt like some mythical thing that real people supposedly went to. I went alone, didn’t know anyone. Within an hour I’d laughed more than I had in months. By the end of the weekend I had a group text with six strangers who felt like they’d known me for years. Went back every year since. Still in the group chat.

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Anonymous, 26, Spain

I searched “tickling community” for the first time at 2am on a Tuesday. I found the forums. I read for four hours. I felt, for the first time, like this thing I’d never been able to explain to anyone was just… normal. Lots of normal people, all with the same weird, specific thing. I cried a little, honestly. Not sad crying. Just the kind where something that’s been tight in your chest for a long time suddenly loosens.

I didn’t post anything that night. I just read. But I kept the tab open.

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Want to share your first time story? Post in the community forum — we may feature future submissions here.